Two Lawyers And A Vamp
by SparklingDiamond2
Summary: Lindsey learns of Darla and Lilah's little trist, and darla decides to hook them up. No Reveiw... no contine!!!! (Rated G but rating may change to anything as high as NC17... Depends what I write.)
1. 1

Two Lawyers and a Vamp:  
  
Disclaimer: I own none of the characters! Just the story line and dialogue!  
  
Fanmail goes to me here: Buffpassdinotoni@aol.com  
  
Lilah:   
  
Lilah walked into Lindsey's office a huge smile implanted on her lips. She sat down on a chair and started going through files, still smiling. "What're you so giddy about?" Lindsey asked.   
  
"Nothing..." She replied still smiling.  
"Liar..."  
  
"Nothing." Lilah said again, trying harder to not smile.  
  
"Come on Li,  
  
***I hate/love when he calls me that. Hate it, because well... Its Li, but I love it, because with his accent, any words he says with an 'I' in them, are very good.***  
  
I know when your in a good mood, and there are only two things that put you in a good mood, a client and sex, so which is it."  
  
"Well, what if its sex... with a client?"  
  
"Intriguing... Which one?"  
  
"Not telling, it'll hurt your feelings."  
  
"Why? Is it one of my clients?"  
  
"Its one of OUR clients."  
  
"So, that means it Mr. Bristly."  
  
"Nope."  
"But the only client we share besides Bristly, is Darla."  
  
Then Lilah got a devilish smile on her face.  
  
He stood up. "WHAT! ARE YOU SERIOUS? YOU AND..."  
  
Darla walked in the room and saw him screaming. "Ow, my ears."  
  
"YOU SLEPT WITH LILAH!"  
  
She looked at Lilah. "Oh don't worry Darla, I can keep a secret, I wont tell Lindsey!"  
  
"I'm sorry..."  
  
Darla hit her with a pillow. "You promised."  
  
Lilah pouted and bat her eyes.  
  
"It wont work..."  
  
So she pouted even more."  
  
"Fine, you're forgiven.  
  
"Oh my god your flirting... STOP IT." He shrieked at Lilah and Darla.  
  
"You think that's bad watch this." Darla grabbed her and kissed her.  
  
Then Lindsey stormed out.  
  
*** 


	2. 2

Lindsey:  
  
Darla and Lilah sat in Lilah's bedroom eating something Lilah had whipped up.   
  
***Love the girl and all, but she can not cook. Actually no I don't love the girl. I hate her, alot. And now she's sleeping with *my* Darla. Alright, granted she's not mine. If anything she's the firms, or Angel's. But I like saying she's mine... So what if I'm spying on them? I'm allowed to. And it wouldn't be the first time I snuck around Lila's house in the middle of the night, and that I came out wrong. I meant that I've broken into her house and stolen files, and gone through her panty draw. Well, thats the place woman keep things they want secret. Like this see-through black teddy Lilah has... And her Diary. Which I read. And don't feal an ounce of guilt for. There was even a passage in there about me. Mmhmm. And about certain things our little Lilah had a dream about doing to me. Boy, that made me uncomfortable for the next week. Well, actually last week, but that doens't matter now cause she's sleeping with *my* (oh shut up) Darla. She is mine damnit I saw her first.  
Ahh, I think they saw me. No they didn't. Oh, god-damnit! There kissing! It's not that I have ANYTHING against lesbians or anything. Hell, if Lilah wants to date my own sister. I wouldn't care. But she can't have *my* Darla. I have a problem with seeing the woman I love, Darla not Lilah, kissing the woman I hate, Lilah not Darla. I can't believe they are sle... slee.... I can't say it... Hell, I can't even think it. I guess I just can't stand the fact that Darla wants *her* over me... It's distressing. I let her stay in my home, I gave her credit cards, bought her clothes... But no, none of that mattered. And, it's not like she chose Lilah and not me because she's gay, she's just horny. Whats Lilah got that I don't? Well besides a black see-through teddy and a great pair of br... legs. Not that I spend my time looking at Lilah's legs, or her chest for that matter.***  
  
"Lindsey? What the hell are you doing???" Lilah yelled at him, interupting his babbling thoughts.  
  
*** 


	3. 3

Darla  
  
He turned. "I was spying on you two."  
  
"Ah, so you're that kind of guy eh Linds? You wanna watch?" Darla smirked.  
  
"No! I meant I was watching to see if there was some way I could get you guys to stop..." He rambled on.  
  
"That's so typical! You're homophobic aren't you." Darla scowled at him.  
  
"No, It's not that its..." ***Oh that's cute, he's trying to find the right words to say.***  
  
"He not homophobic." Lilah smiled. "He's greedy."  
  
"Greedy?" Both Lindsey and Darla asked.  
  
"Lindsey wants you all to himself Darla."  
  
"That's not true." He spat, knowing very well that it was.  
  
"He does?" ***I just ended up looking too cute, so I put on an angry disposition... Have an image to hold up...***  
  
"Yep, our boy here is all in love with you." Lilah again smirking.  
  
"You are???" Darla looked down into his eyes.  
  
"Yes he is."  
  
"Lilah, let him answer." She snapped at her. Which she had to say she enjoyed. Can't be too nice, all the time.  
  
Lindsey looked up at her with those eyes of his and stood.  
  
"I am not in love with you."  
  
"Then, your in love with Lilah?"  
  
"I am not in love with Lilah."  
  
***Oh boy... For me,   
  
Lilah + Me= Something to pass the time.  
  
But for Lilah... Lilah + Me= Making Lindsey jealous, and getting attention from him.  
  
By the look I saw on Lilah's face when Lindsey said he didn't love her... Well she looked heart broken.*** "Hmm" Darla said aloud, though unintentionally. ***I'll set them up, Though judging by the angry glares the two were exchanging... 'If it's the last thing I do'... WELL... It just might be...***  
  
*** 


	4. 4

Lilah  
  
***I hate that man, I really-really do. He is such a pig! I wish I could just kick his ass. Well, I am taller! Little short boy. Not a man... Boy... If I had one wish it would be to... Throw him onto a table and kiss him. Yeah... That's what my wish would be... I hate him so much! Then why can't I stop dreaming about him? And, why the hell do I care about him at all? I mean... I'm only doing this Darla and I thing, to get some attention from Linds, BUT WHY THE HELL DO I WANT HIS ATTENTION! Oh no... Could it be that I'm... Falling for him??? No that's absolutely insane... and OUT OF THE QUESTION. I can't possibly love... him... How could I love anyone with those... horrible... baby blue eyes, and that awful smile, which makes you want to kiss him. And a voice... Oh god, he has the worst voice in the entire world, first time I heard it, I just wanted to throws him on the ground and jump on him, and, I saw him shirtless once... Ooh... so... horrible... he was all... muscular  
and... Oh god I need a drink.***  
  
Lilah grabbed her drink and chugged it, She looked up at the Host. The Host looked down. "You alright Hon?"  
  
"No! Do I look alright to you!!!"  
  
"Let me guess, Guy troubles?"  
  
She scoffed, confirming his question.  
  
"So, whose the lucky guy???"  
  
"He's not lucky... He hates me"  
  
"Im sure that not true... What'd he say that made you think he hated you?"  
  
"I hate you."  
  
"Oh... I see... Well, that does complicate the equation, but I don't see how any guy could hate such a pretty girl as you..."  
  
"I hate Lindsey!"  
  
"McDonald?"  
  
"You know him?"  
"He's singing in 3 minutes..."  
  
Lilah went to get up to run out before Lindsey saw her, then she ran face first into Lindsey. 


End file.
